Broken Innocence

by Raymond Fenech


I don’t even know how we came to be
in my bedroom – you locked the door;
I was thirteen and wanted to feel
the first shiver of excitement
that came like air into a deflated balloon;
you were twelve, and also wanted something new.
So you unbuttoned my shorts,
peeled them down,
slowly, with trembling hands.
Your veins were strained
your voice husky –
you tried to hide your eagerness
but your fast breathing gave you away.
I had only dreamt this moment.
Now you were fondling my erection.
I could only moan my consent.
In vain, I tried to hide my eruption,
then, you sucked my shyness away
until I was no longer ashamed of my nakedness.
You felt for my soul right inside me.
You kissed me, asking if I loved you.
But you didn’t wait for my reply.
I doubt I knew what to answer.
Perhaps later – this was the first
of many sessions still to come.
We were both eager to experiment;
we both wanted to embark into the unknown.
The door was a safety barrier
against grown-ups and religion.
When I exploded and couldn’t stop,
it collapsed the walls of my prison.
We both knew what we wanted;
we both got what we had dreamed about
and ate each other to the bone.
Unconsciously we saw through life
and discovered a shade of grey.
Then, rains fell abundantly outside
and lightning shook us awake.

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2 thoughts on “Broken Innocence

  1. Damn I love this poem–especially here

    You kissed me, asking if I loved you.
    But you didn’t wait for my reply.

    and

    Unconsciously we saw through life
    and discovered a shade of grey

    Beautiful

  2. Thank you so much Amy – your appreciation meant so much to me and made my day. I am Maltese and have always written in English. Have been doing it since I was 13. In my country, opening for writers 43 years ago were non-existent in fact I really had to struggle against all odds to succeed. My family thought I was mad when I announced I wanted to become a professional writer because in those days writing and journalism were not even considered a profession. BUT I’m very hard headed and simply went on to make my dream come true. At 17, I was freelancing for three major political newspapers and since then I never looked back. I am a creative writing tutor now for a small UK based online university and last year I became the first writing therapist in Malta thanks to a scholarship from the Creative Righting Center, Hofstra University’s NY, USA. I am known to be a writer and journalist in Malta, but very few have read my poems. It’s very parochial here to become one of the chosen few and I really never cared to do that. I love writing and when people like your good self bother to at least comment on my poems, I really appreciate them. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my work. Cheers

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